Earthwhomp

I expect that this will last for a couple of weeks. Due to a bunch of unforeseen circumstances, the desire to comic has completely left me. This means there will probably still be comics, they'll just be less regular.

No Baby On Board (BONUS)

Why can't childless people have obnoxious stickers in their back windows too? I want to put this everywhere. In sticker form.

Swallow

There are some areas in which the gender gap is completely in favour of one sex or another. This is what I think of every time someone complains girls have it so awesome.

First Panel Shenanigans (Bonus 2 of 2)

If you don't know the story, go back one post, or god help you if you're too lazy to to that, you can click here. (Note: if you clicked that, I hate you.)
Anyhoo, After the previous exchange This intrepid artist sent me this first panel:

And after looking at it (and music and various things on the internet that caught my attention) for a good half-hour, I started on this:

Apologies for the tiny text in the third panel. I have terrible penmanship. I might have to figure out how to put text in this program without taking the extra minute to move it from MS Paint. Yes Paint.

First Panel Shenanigans (BONUS 1 of 2)

Okay, context first. This talented young man posted a thread to Reddit asking fellow internet lurkers to post the potential first panel of a comic. I posted this:

To which he replied:

Well, I thought this was completely hilarious, and I invited him to draw me a first panel. That'll be a bonus on THURSDAY.

Belted By Beta Rays

Non Sequitur! Two bonuses this week. Oooooooooo.....

PornPorn: Zoomed Desktop (BONUS)

As per a few people's requests, here is an enlarged image of the screen from this week's comic. This tiny part had more jokes than the comic itself, but it wasn't big enough to actually show up. I couldn't leave this little guy unseen.

Every Generic Porn Ever

I'm an alcoholic, so here's an early update. Don't tell polite society.

Sometimes I want to watch porn, however, every generic porn I've ever seen features some screaming harlot that won't shut the hell up. I can't be alone on this.

Intervention

This is all I can think of every time I watch this show. Why aren't you playing this RIGHT NOW?

The Awkwardest Boner

I created this comic in between bouts vomitting forever.

Halloween, Motherfuckers.

It's Halloween! Halloween is my FAAAAvorite time of year. What are you going as? Post in the comments section if it's something that's not retarded. Or if it's something literally retarded; I like my costumes to shift the paradigm.

Cupcake

Fact: Now you will feel terrible every time you eat a cupcake.

Not me, I'm a monster; as such, I feel more compelled to bake and hunt them.

Mosquitoes

I figured I would post this while the memory of mosquitoes was fresh in everyone's mind. this was meant to be a bonus, but then my cousin got married, and I am a bitter old lady.

The real comic will be the bonus this week.

Papercut

It's the first comic I ever did! Ever! I was contemplating not posting it, because I think there are too many panels. Aside from being a little long, it still makes me giggle.

Spanksgiving

Sorry for the late comic guys! It's late because it's a long weekend or something! 


Note: Something may or may not be that I got drunk and thought it was Saturday.

Macrodermabrasion (BONUS)

I was wondering if I should post this one because it differs so greatly from my regular style, but what else are these bonuses for? They're for that, and for posting an unrelated claim token. VS7UM5GA24XZ . You saw nothing, carry on.

Mark

I may or may not have made this one too big. 
This is Mark. He is a Sharkmonkey. Sharkmonkeys are loud, terrifying, and smelly, but their rarity means that they don't see each other very often. That's sad because Sharkmonkeys are the only sentient beings that are not instinctively afraid of other Sharkmonkeys. 
Sharkmonkeys live in whatever the hell place that bird lives. Tourists are also there. Old tourists.

Teenage Emo Goths (BONUS)

I believe this is the first single-panel comic I'd ever done. It's only right that it go first. This was an attempt at not having a comic full of rich, vomitty colour. I think I failed, but IT'S JUST SO PRETTY.

Little Miss Mortar Board's School of Stop It.

I don't know why stuff like this bugs me so badly. It could be because I grew up in a redneck hicktown where this is how every uneducated alcoholic babymomma talked. 

Seriously, if you live in a town where the young people have nothing better to do than get drunk and hump each other, it might be time to move.

But I digress. Here's a comic. 

Necroromancer (BONUS)

Look at this! It's one of my first comics! Yes, for the bonus in the next couple of weeks, I will be posting the comics I had made before I started this blog. They might not be entirely new, and some of you might have seen them before, but newcomers deserve to see some of the better ones. 

This is definitely one of my favorites so far. It will always have a special place in the pulsating chunk of muscle housed within my chest cavity.

Sex Pizza

This is one of the reasons I don't have a boyfriend. This and the fact that I have human remains in my freezer. 

The reasons are all freezer-related.

WaitStation 3 (BONUS)

Every goddamn time I turn this thing on, I have to update it until I forget why I was on there in the first place. I figured I might as well enjoy it. 

 It's not funny enough for a regular update, but it is mildly amusing, so I figured I'd make it a bonus this week.

Spiders

Spiders freak me the hell out. Have you ever been so creeped out that you drew a giant eyeball? Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.

Pageantry (BONUS)

So, for future reference, I will be updating this comic weekly on Sundays. Hopefully I will be able to continue this for awhile. This comic is a bonus, because I'm just so excited about the new blog, and I wanted to have a new comic here for people who may have seen the previous one already. Feel free to comment, link follow, and pimp me out to your friends.

5 Seconds

 

And so it begins.